This article was published in the "Martinelli Newspapers" in the May 25, 2006 weekly issue of The Westchester Crusader, The Rye Chronicle, The Eastchester Record, The Pelham Sun, The Sound View News Home News & Times, The Mt. Vernon Independent, Harrison Independent
and North Castle News

Life and Money - "Suggestions for Scammers - Part 2 "

By Frank Sisco, CPA, PFS

(Word count = 1,487 including 67 words for About the Author)

(Note:  This essay contains irony and sarcasm.) It's important to protect yourself against scams because scammers can steal your financial information,  your money and your identity.  You will then be faced with scores of hours to try to straighten out the mess, and possibly become implicated in a felony.  Perhaps, worse yet, especially if the scam is ridiculous, you will lose self-esteem over getting sucked in and for using such poor judgment.  Last week's column covered a proposed scheme outlined by Mr. Thao Lee Wong, a bank officer in Hong Kong, China, in a detailed email to me that stated I could be paid $6,375,000 if only I helped make happen a certain transfer of unclaimed money from his bank.  I offered several suggestions to Mr. Wong on how to make the scamming email more credible, in an effort to minimize the embarrassment suffered by the very gullible people among us who might fall for the scam.  This week's column deals with scams that involve lotteries, prizes, and services.  Again, I will offer suggestions to the scammers to help them be more convincing.  First, some email excerpts, then a few suggestions.

 Email #1 - Lottery - This email to me dated 1/19/2006 notified me that I won an internet lottery and had been approved for a lump sum payment of $2.5 million US dollars.  Copied below is the email, typos included.

From - DESTINY PROMO LOTTERY BV.

Groot Hertoginnelaan 45, 2517 Pt Amsterdam, The Netherlands.

FROM: OFFICE OF THE DIRECTOR,, INTERNATIONAL CLAIM DEPARTMENT, REF NO: DPL / 701-62-6OI00-04

BATCH: XT208/01/XZT

Dear Sir / Madam,

RE: AWARD NOTIFICATION / FINAL NOTICE

We are pleased to inform you of Today’s announcement of lucky winners of the DESTINY PROMO LOTTERY THE NETHERLANDS, INTERNATIONAL PROGRAM held on 19th January 2006. Your email address was attached to the ticket number 11583-063; with serial number 3496-00 drew the lucky numbers 00-11-23-23-00, and consequently won the lottery in the 1st category.

You have hereby been approved for a lump sum payment of US $2.5m in cash credited to your file REF NO: DPL /701-62-6OI00-04. This is from total prize money of US$25,000.000.00 shared among the ten (10) International winners in this category. All participants were selected through a computer Ballot system drawn from 50,000 email addresses from AUSTRALIA, NEW ZEALAND, AMERICA, EUROPE, NORTH AMERICA and ASIA as part of international promotion programs, which is conducted annually.

CONGRATULATIONS!!! Your fund is now deposited with a Finance House and insured in your favour due to the mixed up of some numbers and mail addresses. We ask that you keep this award strictly from public notice until your claim has been processed and your money remitted to your account. This is part of our security protocol to avoid double claiming or unscrupulous acts by participants of this program. We hope with a part of your prize, you will participate in our next year high stakes international lottery.

To begin your claim, please contact your claim agent below immediately:

. . (. . And then there is a name, address and email, some other reminders, and then . . . .  .)

Congratulations again from all our staff and thank you for being part of our promotion program. You are advised to inform us of your receipt of this mail.

Sincerely, MRS. MONICA BOEMAN. THE PROMOTIONS MANAGER, DESTINY PROMO LOTTERY, THE NETHERLANDS

Email #1 - Suggestions:

1.  Monica, my prize amount is much too low.  How do you expect me to stop what I'm doing to focus on a mere $2.5 million prize, especially after deducting the related income taxes and financial planning fees that may be involved.  I suggest $100 million, or an annuity payment of $10 million per year for life, with a 50% survivor annuity when I die.  As mentioned to Mr. Wong last week, you are competing with huge state lotteries, and even multi-state lotteries offering hundreds of millions of dollars. 

2.  I like the Netherlands aspect of your email, but some of the words left me cold. I guess "Groot Hertoginnelaan" is a town, but it sounds very dank and depressing.  Maybe "Groov Hertenzalen" is easier for me to pronounce to myself as I read the email, and thus I'd feel more comfortable.  Also, I would drop "Promo" and just call it "Destiny Lottery" and change your title from  "The Promotions Manager" to "The Relationship Manager," which can endear you to the reader, like big banks try to do.

3.  I guess you are trying to compare your lottery to traditional lotteries by saying I am one of ten people picked by a lottery to share $25 million, but it feels too impersonal to me, especially because I did not even buy a ticket.  Makes me feel like I'm just a number.  Not really destiny like you call it, just dumb luck. To me, destiny involves more of my inner spirit somehow being recognized in the universe.  Sort of like an alignment of my innermost goals, ambitions, emotions, feelings and thoughts with the great beyond.  Perhaps you can replace the impersonal computerized selection process with one that does recognize my individuality, my core being.  How about something like this to replace the second sentence of your first paragraph.

"Your email name and full name were searched among the millions of websites and billions of emails that we have scanned (all with governmental permission) and your names were noted to have unusually close proximity to certain positive words on the internet (such as love, spirit, goodness, happiness, health, God, soul, help, and many others).  Our computers compared the results with the email names and full names of a representative statistical sample of 500 million other people.  Importantly, we have determined that you are among the top one hundred people whom we found to have an unusually high level of what we term "very positive occurrences," or VPO.  From the group of the top one hundred people with high VPO scores, we selected ten by winners by pulling numbered tags from a large black top hat, using white silk gloves with small gray polka dots."

Now, don't you think that type of selection process would keep me (or the millions of others you sent the email to) reading your email?

Solicitation #2 - Services - I received a 9 X 12 envelope by regular snail mail that had, inside it, a sharp-looking solicitation from a company I had not heard of.  The service being solicited is the protection of my water line that runs from the street to my house, for only $5 per month.  The letter claimed that most homeowner's insurance policies do not cover such damages to the water line between the street and my house, caused by tree roots, shifting ground, freezing weather or a leak, etc. I called my agent who double-checked with an inside specialist and confirmed that my policy did not cover my water line.  Humph.  Should I spend the $5 per month for the offered protection service?  As I thought it through, I shuddered with the thought of my mailbox filling up with solicitations for other very specialized services that are not bona fide but may sound like they are to the unsuspecting public.  My mind raced and came up with these, to let scammers know in advance not to bother.

1.  Protection in mall parking lots from falling overhead lights.

2.  Protection at beaches from sudden tidal waves.

3.  Restitution for damages inflicted by reptiles over 30 feet long.

4.  Reimbursement for property damage incurred in an invasion by beings from another planet.

5.  Special rider for car insurance policy to protect against solar flares interfering with ignition systems and engine performance, causing overheating and cracking engine blocks.

6. Protection against stampedes of horses into crowds at racetracks, and reimbursement of related medical expenses.

7.   Flat payment of $8,000 awarded for loss of self-esteem that may result from profanity uttered by laptop computers using Wi-Fi connections in parks and at coffee shops.

Kidding aside, scams can be very harmful.  Use common sense.  Remember to doubt and ask the advice of trusted people if you are faced with a proposal that seems like it is too good to be true.  By the way, while I was talking with my agent, he informed me of a new insurance rider for only $40 per year that protects my spouse and I against identity theft.  I gave him the go-ahead to add it right away.   Perhaps you should call your agent, too.

About the author.

Frank Sisco is a CPA and Personal Financial Specialist, and author of many articles about personal finance and issues of life and money.   His firm, Financial Management Corporation, is located in Harrison, NY.  Frank resides with his wife and daughter in New Rochelle, NY.  He can be reached at 914.381.3737 or by email at ideasmoney@aol.com.  Visit his website at www.LifeAndMoney.com, which contains this and prior articles.